Thursday, April 22, 2010

So Far Away...humor about aging...

April 22, 2010

So Far Away

Oh, the humanity. It’s finally happened and I noticed it in the shower of all places. I cannot read ant-dropping sized font, at least not without Dollar-Tree assisted eyewear. And how does the shower come into play? I’m glad you asked!

The shampoo and conditioner are not even distinguishable from one another sans the ability to read those names on the bottles, so I’ve been experiencing a reverse cleansing effect with my hair.

Instead of lather, rinse, repeat, I’ve got condition, wait, rinse out – uh, oh! Why is this stuff still so greasy when I just washed it? It’s humbling to realize that, at this stage of the game, I am more interested in sharpies (to create my own large-fonted labeling system), cheap magnifying glasses and magical potions as well as undergarments that will render me gravity-defying in every way than, well, anything else!

Oh, don’t get me wrong I still hanker for all of the “girlie” things that have me still playing dress-up and applying colors not found in nature; however, my beauty regimen is less about perfection nowadays, more about starting off on the right foot, or with the right bottle, as it were.

It’s sad, but I used to laugh at poor Mr. Magoo with his near-sighted big eyes and seemingly oblivious attitude toward the ill effects of not seeing the world clearly. (And now that I’ve conjured up that cartoon “blast from the past” you may be wondering how it is I don’t have a cane, glasses AND choice parking spot right up next to the designated blue area!)

Payback is a real witch and thy name is Myopia!

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